window

Veritas Ratio’s eyes opened slowly as he woke from his night slumber. His arms subconsciously reached for the existence on the other side of the bed, yet the only thing he could feel was air, and  then the leftover warmth on the sheets of the bed. Sluggishly, he sat up, yawned, and then decided to fully wake up. He'd known this already from the long years they've been together, but not having her beside him when he woke up truly affect him a little bit too much.

***

“Oh, you’re awake! Good morning, Ratio,”

There she is.

Her high-pitched voice sounded like beautiful chimes to him, and her one smile made Ratio’s heart indescribably full. Truthfully, when they first met, Ratio didn’t even think they’d grow this close – then again, perhaps, everything played right into her hands, after all; as she was a genius in her own right, the type that Ratio was unable to decipher no matter how hard he tried.

“Ratio?”

Her puzzled voice brought Ratio back from his reverie. Now that he’s taken a good look at her, it seems like she was preparing their breakfast. Quietly, Ratio walked towards her, and embraced her from behind.

“Ratio, I’m cooking right now. It’s dangerous.”

He could hear the exasperation in her voice.

“Why were you not by my side when I woke up?” he asked as he buried his face on her neck; inwardly surprised at how childish he sounded. Today too, he was reminded of how standing by her side means to face the sides of himself that he might not even realise exist.

“...Pfft,” she burst into a laugh, “I have a seminar to attend today, so I woke up a little bit earlier to prepare.”

She put her kitchen knife on the counter, turned around, and embraced him in return. After a moment of comfortable silence and of them reaffirming each other’s warmth, she told Ratio to wait for her to finish cooking so they could eat breakfast together. The latter begrudgingly agreed as he sat down on the sofa in the living room – and as he listened to the pleasant sounds of his beloved cooking, he let his mind wander to the memories he had of her.

***

It was years ago when she was still a student at the University of Veritas Prime, a part of the class where Ratio worked as a teaching assistant. She was a bright student, her potentials unlimited and her existence itself looked up to by most of the student body. At the time, she had neither made discoveries nor a name for herself, but everyone could clearly envision a future where she’d become a prominent figure in science, spearheading the future of humanity.

…Yet, for some reason, only in front of him would she make countless mistakes and fumble over the simplest things. And curiously, that never changed, even though they’d interacted quite a lot for a year or more... until one fateful day.

“Take another gander at the numbers you have just written,” Ratio said, as he held in a sigh from escaping his lips.

The girl jolted in surprise at his words. Instinctively she looked at the numbers she wrote a moment ago on the whiteboard, let out an “Ah!” sound, immediately erased them, and wrote a different chain of numbers.

Right now, they were the only ones in the room: of course, as he had specially made time per her request for a discussion on her current research. Why not? Ratio had been interested in her research topic, too, after all, and through this discussion he hoped to discover insights of his own. And yet, here she is, fumbling over a simple equation…

After she finished filling an entire whiteboard, she turned around and looked at Ratio, eagerly awaiting his comment.

“I see. You have decided to tackle this challenge from quite a refreshing point of view,” Ratio commented, “Although I have to say…”

“?”

She tilted her head and waited for Ratio to continue his words.

“I have taken the liberty to do a little observation on you – out of my own inquisitiveness, of course – and peruse the scientific papers you have written,” Ratio started, “Yet, curiously, I have yet to see you exhibit the same pattern of behaviour you tend to show when you are with me.”

“...And by that, you mean?” she asked, but Ratio could see that she understood what he meant through the blizzard of emotions in the depths of her eyes and slightly trembling voice.

“...That,” he said, “That air of diffidence… hesitancy… it is quite peculiar, if I may.”

Ratio searched for traces of response on her face, but then saw that she was waiting for his next words with a serious expression, so he continued.

“In the moments I happened to espy you with others, your demeanor was vastly different,” he said, “You were always brimming with confidence… your words held a certain weight to them. Poles apart from how you perform around me.”

Ratio studied her expression. She’s now biting her lip, seemingly contemplating on how to reply to his observations.

“I think… I think it’s normal for me to feel nervous around you, Mr. Ratio,” she said, “After all, you are none other than Dr. Veritas Ratio, the holder of First Class Honors Degree, the legend of our university, and–”

Ratio cut her long-winded speech short, “Although I understand from whence you came from, at the same time, our university is home to many such people… including those you interacted with.”

“That’s…”

She was about to say something, but then she stopped midway and took a deep breath. Once, twice, three times… and with newfound determination, she fixed her gaze on Ratio, looking him straight in the eye, and started speaking.

“Mr. Ratio,” she said, “This might sound peculiar and out of nowhere, but…”

Ratio focused his attention on her, awaiting her next words.

“I… adore you,” she said, “I admire you, yes, but not only that, I adore you. Of your existence. Of everything you stood for.”

Ratio’s eyes widened in surprise. He didn’t know what he expected, but it definitely wasn’t this kind of abrupt confession.

“You’re the reason I’m here, on this path, where I am now,” she continued, “And I know this is impertinent of me, but my dearest wish is to leave a mark on you – I wish to remain more than yet another speckle of shadow in your vast memory.”

“...And this is your idea of leaving a mark?”

She chuckled, “One of them, to be exact. Considering our exchange today, I think it was quite effective.”

There weren’t any mirrors so he couldn’t say for sure, but Ratio felt like his face must be showing a rather mixed expression at the moment.

“...This is one out of many,” she continued, “And I hope that you will continue to stand by me on my quest – call it an experiment, if you may.”

Ratio raised an eyebrow, “And what would I stand to gain from such endeavors?”

She then gave what Ratio noticed to be the brightest smile he’d ever seen coming from her.

“Insights to the sides of yourself that you may not even know exist – your blind and unknown self.”

And the rest is history.

***

A short moment later, both of them enjoyed a warm breakfast in a comfortable silence. That day, Ratio didn’t think this was what it would all lead to, but perhaps it was her tenacity and devotion that allowed her to achieve what she sought. Plus, she did keep her side of the bargain – and as he sipped his tea, Ratio thought that perhaps, there’s no end to the new discoveries awaiting the both of them… both in life, and in science.